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Monday, April 24, 2006

who's bitchy?

went down to one of the four coffee blackheads within' a minute's ride of the office.

wanted a latte. you know, wanted a good dose of leche in my gullet to help slide in the caffiene all frothy-like.

so, i roll into the place and nobody looks a nod at me as I stand at the corner. that's all cool, no rush to get back to the desk. then, up appears crazy Jane ... i think she wasn't even working, just felt sorry for me standing there and walked behind the counter and took my order.

so then, she hands off the latte order to some lil' teen angel and i look all sheepish like as I take two choco-chip cookies from the jar o' sin.


anyway, jane goes her own way and i wait for my latte. the nor Cal chipmunk with soCal sass hands it to me and it's awfully light. no volume at all.


so, i walk over to the sugar depot, hoping i've gotten 8 hours of recovery sleep and don't know my own strength. I pop open the lid and ... sure enough, it's about 3 ounces of milk, an ounce of espresso, and 12 cubic feet of foam.

double shyte.

by now the girlyQ is chatting it up all flirty like with benBrooks5 behind the counter so I can't get one ounce of distraction out of her.


"heyo, lil help?"

finally, "hey, can you poor some more milk in this thing for me? It was pretty low."

yikes, it was like I was four different flavors of mold all wrapped up in her tampon.

In disgust, she yanks the tank and slops mas leche in my cup.

"thanks, tons. And, it's a latte ... so that's more milk. Cappuccino is less milk, more foam."

oh, she was really pissed to be told her profession.

"hey, get your ass happy and be thankful somebody told you."

stupid santa cruz.


Hick said...

Been there.

X Bunny said...

sounds like someone's got a little sand in his vagina

Velo Bella said...

Don't worry

I am leaving work right now so that I can pace my little pinata safely back home.

look for me

Olaf Vanderhoot said...

mmm ... cross blogification.

me = happy

- - -

sand in his vag ... bwaaahaahaaa.

PAB said...

you know, there would be some advantages to a mechanized world.

ie, no personal interactions required, especially on mondays...

Velojuice said...

I was in the SC this a.m. no OV sightings, little turn around trip then back to purgatory by noon. Sorry I couldn't be with you to teach the youngins to have some R-E-S-P-E-C-T for her elders!

Nome Agusta said...

Maybe she was mad that you didn't flirt with her.

At what age do we officially become dirty old men?


le petit lutin said...

Oh crap...I thought people in SC were cool!!!
And nome, just those words "dirty old men" make me sick.

ginmtb said...

I think the nazi coffee baristas have taken over for the record store employee - remember walking in to buy a CD and they give you all that attitude? Come on you dumba$$, you're not in the music industry - you sell records.

Anonymous said...

If one grain of that sand sticks will it turn into a pearl?

Chico Cyclist said...

Are you guys seeing this all over the place?? I'm noticing stuff like this happening up here in Chico all the time.....and you makes me feel like an old fart.

~ boots said...

old men are often very cranky... yelling at the sky... shaking the fist at a stick... hey you kids get off my lawn...

Nome Agusta said...

Correction: It's get off my lawn, Damn-it!

The "Damn-it" is very important, it defines the difference between grumpy and whiney.

Lothar Glerbny said...

These are the bubble people. I have been developing this theory for some time. They operate in a bubble that for most extends about 3' beyond their actual skin and bones. The only things allowed in the bubble are those things they bring in. Everything outside the bubble is of no consequence to them. No consideration or respect for the world around them. Cell phones, PDAs, Blackberries...all these things bring the world in to their bubble so they have less need to go or even look outside.

These yutes are also part of what I call the Entitlement Generation. They have been raised in a world where their parents and our government taught them that they are not required to work hard to get ahead...they are entitled to a good life.

Check out Talk to the Hand

I worked part time in a bike shop with some of these EG kids where they made $9.50/hr (I made $8.25...three years ago) and %&*$#

Lothar has been removed from his soap box. Unfortunately in the process he sprained his brain. He will be unable to climb back up for several days. The doctor recommended a long bike ride but today is his off-bike day